How gay is it?

I recently accepted a number of gold card applications, just to stop them from mailing me applications. Now I have a couple of gold cards. I figure I'll cycle them, accepting new ones as long they are postage prepaid, and cutting up the old ones with bad interest rates.

However, I never counted on one of them sending me a little advertising flap with some piece of kitsch (sp?) light manufacturing for sale.

I looked at the first one and said ``that is so gay'', then I asked my roommates to rate it on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being the least gay, and 10 being the most. Here are the results:

``consume''

The Baby Boombox (tm): yours for only $9.99 (for each item add $3.99 postage and handling plus applicable taxes, if any). AM/FM, telescoping antenna, built-in speakers, and fold-down carry handle, but it's small enough to fit almost anywhere! Measuring in at a slim 7.24'' wide by 3.25'' tall...
Survey says:
7 8 8
Caroling Christmas Clock: yours for only $29.99(for each item add $6.99 postage and handling plus applicable taxes, if any). Plays one of 12 Christmas Carols, each hour, on the hour.
Survey says:

a clarification

For those of you so pathetically un-hip as to not know what I mean when I say something is ``gay'', I feel I must clarify myself. It has nothing to do with homosexuality.

translation

``That is so gay'': Whoever thought of trying to sell me that item should have their tits/scrotum nailed to a frightened cat

For those of you who needed this clarification to keep them from becoming upset on P.C. grounds: fuck you.

Back to White Hot Lesbo Action!

Robert Forsman <thoth@purplefrog.com>

Last modified: Sat Oct 7 12:07:06 1995