Kick God's Nuts

``God doesn't exist, and he's a jerk.''

I have this idea for a religion. All the religious ceremonies are designed to prepare you for the instant when you die and you get to meet god. At that point you have one chance to try to kick him in the nuts.

If you actually succeed in kicking god in the nuts, it triggers the end of the universe. Of course, he is god, so you would have to be really fast to rack his balls before he blocked you. That is why the universe still exists today. The ball-busting messiah has not yet died.

Why kick God in the nuts?

Because if any human on this planet was responsible for the universe as it is today, you would kick him in the nuts. I think it is only fair to hold god to the same standards we hold our fellow humans.

So, everybody go out and buy a dummy so you can practice your nut-busting, and when you are on your death-bed, think of all the things that suck and are god's fault and get ready to make your attempt to put an end to the misery of all existence.

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